March 23rd, 2011
today.. I threw in the towel.. after two energetic days with no nap.. it shouldn’t have surprised me when I woke up way to early.. and Olive followed.. and she was grumpy.. followed by many tantrums.. a scream in my face.. and a phone call to daddy.. (me.. not her).. I couldn’t do it.. the fear that this would be my life soon on lack of sleep scared me.. it is moments like these I wish my mama was here to take her for an hour.. maybe two ;) I called my sister.. a 62 minute vent fest on anything and everything.. she finally said she had to go.. and I laughed and told her I don’t blame her.. I was annoying myself ;)
it took 2 hours to get out of the house to run errands.. a friend text for a park date.. and I said we would try.. but my energy levels were bi polar and changing every 5 minutes.. I finally threw on some sweats.. and drove to the park.. the fresh air is exactly what I needed.. I laughed when I walked into the park area and saw that I was dressed like the only man there.. literally..
big red sweater.. black pants..
oy
look at that face!
on the way home.. I came home determined.. I didn’t need a nap! I was going to charge through.. put my yawning red head to bed.. and was going to wash my car.. it looks grey.. when it should be black.. tossed her in the big girl bed.. grabbed my i pod and hose.. and started cleaning.. within 5 minutes.. I knew I had taken on to much.. i stood at the car wondering if i stopped now.. would anyone notice the patch that was black?! my ear bud fell out and I heard Olive SCREAMING through the monitor.. not her normal “i don’t want to nap” scream.. I ran up and she had clearly fallen asleep so fast and was having a nightmare..
olive scared.. big puppy dog.. olive sad..
yes I had it.. my out.. I couldn’t wash my car.. my baby needed me!! brought her downstairs for some cuddles.. and realized I had to continue.. went out and finished while she played.. and I think its safe to say I did the crappiest job EVER on my car.. ** note the hose is still out there with the bucket **
realized my defeat.. put olive back down. to more screams.. and realized I was going down without a nap.. so for the first time ever.. I brought her in my room to nap.. I didn’t think it would happen.. I knew she was exhausted from the park.. and I just pretend to sleep.. next thing I knew.. I woke up to sweet little baby feet by my face.. nothing sweeter then a baby in a diaper and a cute little white shirt.. with her red whispy hair tossled all around..
me on the other hand was in my ragged white sports bra.. raging hot because of the sun beaming through the window.. and for the first time this pregancy.. could barely bend my fingers because of water retention.. not to shabby..
time to get back to packing.. daddy leaves tomorrow.. and we are hibernating in Canada for the weekend.. I don’t do alone nights anymore since I got pregnant. I don’t sleep anyways because I am so paranoid someone is going to break in. and my “escape route people” have moved to Lynden.. :0
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